Undisclosed Desires of His Heart
by Laurie Whitlock
Summary: Edward leaves Bella but not all the Cullen's are there when she goes to say goodbye. Who is the one vampire that stays behind to make sure that she is alright? Will Bella want this person to stay? Will they become more than friends? Will Bella ever be able to help him get over his hurt? Will he be able to help her over her pain as well? Set after Edward's leaving in New Moon, rated


**A/N: **I own nothing, all known characters belong to their owners. Beta by: JoyfulyetHesitantPen. So here I go again, another new story. Let's see how we do on this one shall we?

**Summary: **Edward leaves Bella but not all the Cullen's are there when she goes to say goodbye. Who is the one vampire that stays behind to make sure that she is alright? Will Bella want this person to stay? Will they become more than friends? Will Bella ever be able to help him get over his hurt? Will he be able to help her over her pain as well? Set after Edward's leaving in New Moon, rated M

"FINE THEN, EDWARD! LEAVE ME! YOU NEVER WANTED ME IN THE FIRST GODDAMN PLACE!" I screamed at the man I thought loved me. But he didn't love me. I see now that I was only a play toy to him because he couldn't hear my thoughts.

"Bella, please..."

"No, Edward. I don't want to hear your lies anymore. Just go but know this; you can't keep me from saying goodbye to your family. I have that right."

He just nodded and said, "Would you like me to carry you?"

"No, I don't want you to touch me anymore. I'll take my truck."

He just nodded again and took off while I turned on my heel and walked back in the direction of my house and truck. I was thankful that the drugs Carlisle gave me weren't kicking in yet. I knew that if they had been I would have needed Edward to drive me because Carlisle told me not to drive while on these pills.

I pulled up in front of the Cullen's house and saw that Em was waiting on the porch for me. I was glad that Edward didn't try to make them all leave before I got there because that would have made me even more pissed. I turned off the engine and Em was there, opening my door for me. He gathered me in his arms, and I just hugged him back, letting some tears fall. I didn't want to lose my big brother.

Em sat me back down on the ground, kept hold of my hand and we walked into the house. Everyone had somber looks on their faces, though I'm sure Rosalie's wasn't for me but for the fact that they had to pack up and leave. Esme was the first to come over to me. Em let go of my hand and she wrapped her delicate yet powerful arms around me and just held me as I cried. She was the closest thing that I had to a mother; I'm not saying that Renee wasn't a good mom but I was tired of doing everything for her and when I moved here, it was nice to not have to worry about paying bills, buying groceries and doing everything else that Renee should have done.

"Esme," I whispered to her, fully aware that the others could hear me. "I just want to let you know that you are like a second mom to me. I love you, and I'm going to miss you so much."

"Oh, Bella! You are my daughter even though we are not related by blood or venom. I love you so much, my sweet, and I'm going to miss you just as much."

I cried harder and when she let me go, Carlisle was the next one to hug me.

"Carlisle, I can't thank you enough for all the times you fixed me up when I hurt myself. I love you as well and think of you as a second father. I'm going to miss the hell out of you," I said to him trying not to cry.

"When you entered our lives, Bella, you changed them. You reminded all of us of our humanity. Just like Esme said, you are our other daughter. I love you as well and will greatly miss you." He placed a kiss atop my head before he pulled back.

I gave Alice a hug and thanked her for all that she had done for me, even the Bella Barbie makeovers. I hugged Em again and just nodded at Rose, to which she nodded back. As I was standing there looking at everyone, I noticed that Jasper wasn't here.

"Where's Jasper?" I asked turning to face Alice.

"He's already gone, Bella. He wanted me to tell you that he's so sorry for ruining your birthday party, and he just hopes that one day you'll forgive him."

"There is nothing to forgive. I don't blame him. Promise me, Alice, that you'll tell him that I don't blame him for any of this."

"I promise Bella," she replied.

I knew that there was nothing else left to say. These people that I loved dearly were leaving me because of Edward and there was nothing that could be said or done to make them stay. It was time for me to leave. I couldn't handle seeing them go, so after giving everyone except for Rosalie another hug, I raced from the house, amazed that I didn't fall, and hopped into my truck. I wiped the tears and snot from my face before I started to drive. I couldn't look back when I got to the end of the drive because it would have been too painful.

As I drove, I kept crying, and when I finally got to my house, I put the car in park, grabbed my keys, raced into the house and all the way to my bedroom. I could hear Charlie calling after me but there was no way I could answer him right now. I needed to cry. I opened my bedroom door and flung myself onto my bed and just sobbed. I heard Charlie come in, but he didn't say anything, just walked over to the rocking chair and sat there as I cried.

~xx~

I woke up completely disoriented. I didn't know when I had fallen asleep or when Charlie tucked me up in my bed and left for his room. I looked over at my alarm and saw that it was 3:30 in the morning. I slowly got up and made my way into the bathroom where I proceeded to wash the tracks of my tears off my face. Then I went back to my room and walked over to my window. I opened it and sat beside it, letting the fresh, crisp, early morning air hit my face and play with my hair. As I was looking out the window, I thought I saw someone looking back at me. I looked harder but I couldn't see anyone, so I left the window but that feeling of being watched wouldn't go away. I forced myself to go downstairs and out into the backyard to see if my feeling was right or not; I just hopped that it wasn't Victoria waiting for me. I walked closer and closer to the woods, all the while part of my brain was screaming at me to run, and the other half was trying to plan a way to save Charlie if it was, in fact, Victoria.

When I reached the edge of the woods I called out, "Hello, is someone there?"

Stupid thing to do, I know, but I wanted to get this over with.

I only had to wait for a minute before I heard leaves start to rustle. I waited with bated breath to see who or what would emerge from the woods. When I saw the honey blond hair, I let out a sigh of relief.

"Jasper, I'm so glad it's you," I said to the vampire currently standing in front of me.

"I didn't know if ya would want to see me or not, Bella, but I knew I had to come by just to make sure ya were alright," he replied.

"Of course I want to see you. I don't blame you for what happen Jasper."

"How could you not?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Because it's in your nature to feed off of human blood, not to mention that you were feeling the bloodlust of five other vampires."

"That's true, but still, I shouldn't have lunged at you and tried to eat you."

"Jasper, please stop blaming yourself. It was an accident, one that was bound to happen sooner or later."

"If I was strong like Carlisle or Edward, then it would never have been a concern," he protested. "It was a good idea for Edward to keep ya away from me," he mumbled while looking down.

"DON'T YOU DARE COMPARE YOURSELF WITH ANYONE! YOU ARE SPECIAL, NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS!" I screamed, which not only startled me but him as well. I didn't know where that anger had come from. "As for staying away from you, that was one of the stupidest things Edward has ever done. I've always wanted to get to know you Jasper, and I was always frustrated when Edward never let me. I was hoping that when you and Alice took me to Phoenix, you and I would have gotten to know each other better, but Alice never left us alone either." I ended my little rant with a sign.

"I'm sorry, Bella, that we never got to be around each other. I hated that as well. I've always felt that you and I could be very good friends. I have a feelin' that we share things in common, and I've always wanted to see if my hunch was right, but I was never allowed near you."

"Maybe we could get to know each other now," I said quietly.

"There is too much to cover about ourselves to do so tonight," he replied.

"I don't mean go through everything tonight."

"Then what do you mean, Bella?"

"I don't want you to leave. I didn't want Carlisle, Esme, Alice, Em and even Rose to leave, but they did, and I don't think they will ever come back. Well, maybe Em. I just can't deal with losing all of you, and if there was a way I could keep at least one of you in my life, I would take it."

"Well, Alice did want some time alone after my almost attack on you, so perhaps I can stay for awhile. If there is ever a time that you want me to leave, just say so and I'll be gone."

"Thank you, Jasper, for wanting to stay."

"Of course, Bella. Now, let's get you back to bed. I'm sure those pain meds have worn off, and you must be feeling the pain in your arm."

"Now that you mention it, my arm is killing me again," I admitted with a sheepish smile.

"Well, then come on, Bella, let's get you some more pain meds and sleep."

"Will you still be here when I wake up or is all this all a dream?" I asked, so uncertain.

"This isn't a dream darlin', and I will be here when you wake again," he responded with a smile.

I smiled back at him—when he called me darling it sent a pleasant shiver down my spine; I just hoped that Jasper didn't notice the effect that word had on me. It was another thing that I didn't have a clue as to why it affected me so.

Jasper held out his hand for me and we walked back to the house, I got some more pain meds, a bite to eat and trudged back upstairs to my bedroom with Jasper trailing behind me. I excused myself to go change in the bathroom, and when I came back, my sheets were straightened and Jasper was sitting in the rocking chair with a book in his hand.

"Goodnight, Jasper, and thanks for staying," I said while fighting off a yawn.

"Goodnight, Bella. Thanks for wantin' me."

I drifted off to sleep with a smile on my face, knowing that I wasn't totally alone in this world anymore. At least now I had one member of the Cullen family to keep as my own for as long as I wanted, and if I had my way, it would be forever. I had a good feeling that Jasper and I were going to be great friends.

**A/n: **So there we have it, the first chapter in my new story. Can't wait to hear your thoughts. Don't worry I will get back to my other stories that I have open, this is what happens when listening to "Muse" which is where part of the title comes from. Should be an interesting ride.


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